Hare was hosting a big party in his meadow. Everyone was starting to arrive. Even Bear was coming, and Ma and Pa Mouse and Betty and Ralph Rat had said they’d come over after work at the college.
Hare was just bringing out a tray of crackers topped with carrot mousse when Dog arrived, looking tired. Ferret, as usual, was riding on her back. Ferret was dressed up again, this time in an odd assortment of colorful, baggy clothes. He had what looked like a big toothpick tied to his waist.
“Avast!” yelled Ferret when he saw Hare. “Ahoy, me hearties! Shiver me timbers!”
“Um…what?” said Hare, putting the tray down on a nearby stump.
“Ferret saw another Thursday Night Movie,” sighed Dog. “This time it was…what was the title, Ferret?”
“Arr, matey,” yelled Ferret, taking out his toothpick and waving it in the air like a sword. “‘Twas Blackbeard, if twas anything! Aye, and that was just the first. There was another; ‘Treasure Island,’ it be. So stand and deliver, or walk the plank!”
“Deliver what?” said Hare. Then he offered a Ferret a cracker. “Have one of these, Ferret?”
“Yo ho ho, I’ll have a bottle o’ rum, matey” shouted Ferret.
“I’ll have it, thanks,” said Dog, gulping down the cracker. “That’s not bad, Hare. Do you have any without that stuff on top?”
“I can bring some,” said Hare. “But Ferret, I don’t really understand what you’re…”
“Avast!” said Ferret again, and jumped down from Dog’s back. “I be off to follow the map, mateys. The treasure awaits. Beware the black spot!” Ferret dashed off to find Otter and Weasel, who always liked his games.
“Finally,” said Dog, sitting down. “I like Ferret, of course, but when he watches these movies he gets so wrapped up in them. Then he rummages through Sally’s doll cabinet and finds a costume…”
“I’ll thank ye t’ stow such jabber, sailor!” called Ferret. “‘Tisn’t a costume! ‘Tis just the proper dress for a privateer such as meself!”
“Okay, Ferret,” said Dog. “I hope Otter and Weasel keep him busy; I can’t keep up with that little guy. I’m just lucky he sleeps half the day.”
“It looks like he’s found his friends,” said Hare. “Relax, Dog. I’ll bring out some plain crackers.”
Hare hopped into his tree to get Dog some crackers without carrot topping. When he came back out, Dog and Bear were talking.
“I don’t really want to, Bear,” Dog was saying. “It doesn’t matter to me. You probably have a much better nose.”
“It’s not really about that,” said Bear, “I just thought it would be fun, and we’d also get to find out just how good our noses are.”
“How good your noses are?” asked Hare. “Everybody thinks your noses are great.”
“Bear was just suggesting a contest,” said Dog. “To see whose nose is more sensitive.”
“No,” said Bear, “just to see how sensitive both of our noses are.”
“Here are your plain crackers, Dog,” said Hare.
“Thanks,” said Dog. She gulped most of them right away. “Ah, now I feel better,” she said. She scanned the meadow to make sure Ferret was still busy with Otter and Weasel. They seemed to be having a mock sword battle with sticks. “All right,” said said to Bear, “I’ll do it.”
“Good,” said Bear. “Hare, we’ll need somebody to help. How about you?”
“What do I have to do?” asked Hare.
“Just put things where we can smell them but not see them,” said Bear, “and then when we guess, tell us if we’re right.”
“Easy,” said Hare. “I’ve got just the thing; a basket. Wait here and I’ll go get it.”
Hare hopped away, then came out with a large basket. He was carefully hiding what was in it. He turned the basket over on the ground so it covered something. “There we are,” he said, “how what’s under the basked?”
“Carrot,” said Bear and Dog at the same time.
“Oh,” said Hare. “You didn’t even have to do any sniffing. Was that too easy?”
“Maybe,” said Dog. “How about if you stay farther away?”
“Yeah,” said Bear, “try not coming out of your house. Just yell through the window when you’re ready with the next thing.”
“Okay,” said Hare, and hopped inside. A moment later he called “Ready” through his window.
“Radish,” said Dog right away.
Bear sniffed. “TWO radishes,” he said.
“Oh,” said Dog, “is that what we’re doing now? In that case, it is two radishes, and one of them is a little bigger than the other.”
A little crowd of party-goers had gathered to watch the contest. “Wow,” said Magpie, “you two are really good. Wait just a sec; I want to go in and help Hare.”
When Magpie and Hare yelled “ready”, Bear said “crayons.”
“FOUR crayons,” said Dog.
“Two of them are used, and the other two are new,” said Bear, after an extra sniff.
Dog sniffed some more. “There’s a red one, a blue one, a yellow one, and a green one,” she said.
“Hey,” said Magpie out the window, “I thought dogs couldn’t see colors.”
“I can’t,” said Dog. “But I can smell colors.”
Bear sniffed some more. “The used crayons are the red one and the green one,” he said.
Dog sniffed. “And they were used just this morning,” she added, “and they were used to draw letters, not pictures.”
“Right,” said Bear. He sniffed some more. “And the red crayon drew the letters ‘c’, ‘o’, ‘m’, ‘e’, ‘t’, and ‘o.’”
Just so, said Dog, taking another sniff. “The green crayon was used to spell out ‘the party.’”
“HOW ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?” yelled Hare.
“We just have very good noses,” said Bear.
“Sensitive,” said Dog.
They high-fived each other.
“Bear,” whispered Dog, “move a little to the left or somebody’s going to notice that party sign you’re sitting on.”
“Thanks,” whispered Bear, shifting slightly to the left.
Hare and Magpie came out of the house. “We give up,” they said to everyone. “Bear and Dog are tied for the best noses. I still think it was some kind of trick, but maybe not.”
“Arr,” shouted Ferret. “Fifteen Ferrets on a Five Foot Moose!”
“Yo ho ho and a bottle of juice!” answered Otter and Weasel. All three started laughing so hard they fell into a heap.
“What’s going on?” asked Ma Mouse, who had just arrived with everyone else from the college.
“It’s a long story,” said Hare. “Have some crackers.”
