Squirrel was astonished, one morning, to meet someone new in the branches of her home tree. He — or possibly she — was hanging upside down from a sizable limb, apparently asleep. Squirrel stared for a few moments, then started to jump past, thinking he’d come back later when the strange visitor woke up.
“Good morning,” said the visitor, just as Squirrel was getting ready for a big leap onto the next tree. Squirrel was so startled he lost his balance for a moment and teetered crazily before getting his footing again.
“um…er…Hi,” he said when he was safely perched. “Welcome to the forest. I’m Squirrel.”
The visitor smiled widely at Squirrel. Didn’t say anything, just smiled.The silence was making Squirrel nervous, and he was just about to say something — anything — when the visitor said “Thank you, Squirrel. My name is Sloth.”
“Oh, I see,” said Squirrel. Now he was talking too fast because he was still feeling nervous, possibly because Sloth spoke very, very slowly. Squirrel had to hold himself back from saying “yes? yes?” and finishing what Sloth was saying while Sloth was still saying it.
“I’ve just moved here, from quite far away, I think.”
“Really?” said Squirrel. “Where did you live before? And how did you get here?”
Sloth ignored Squirrel’s questions and kept going.
“It seems quite nice here. I hope I’m not disturbing you by being in this tree. I’d be happy to move to a different one.”
It took a long time for Sloth to finish saying all that, and Squirrel was getting so nervous by the end that his tail had started to twitch.
“No, no, perfectly fine with me; don’t move on my account. But sorry, I’ve got to run; busy busy day you know. I’ll see you around, Sloth. Bye.” Squirrel was three trees away by the time Sloth smiled again and said “Goodbye, Squirrel.”
In spite of what he’d said to Sloth, Squirrel hadn’t had any particular plans for the day. But now that he’d met Sloth, he did. He headed straight to Hare’s house and rapped on the door.
“Hi Squirrel, what’s new?” said Hare when he came out.
“New visitor! Or, I mean, new resident I guess,” said Squirrel, who wasn’t nervous any more, but was so excited about his news that his tail was still twitching. “In my tree, upside down, name is Sloth, big smile. Talks slow, Hare, I mean, really slow. Drives me crazy.”
“Slow down,” said Hare. “You mean there’s somebody new, named Sloth, and they’ve moved into your tree? Is that okay with you, Squirrel?”
“Well sure,” said Squirrel, “My house is up in the top of the tree, and Sloth looks too big and heavy to climb up that high. He’s on a…or she is, I’m not sure, on thick, strong one. A branch, I mean. Did I mention about the slow talking?”
“Couple of times,” nodded Hare. “So here’s what we should do, Squirrel. How about a ‘welcome to the forest’ party? Everybody can meet the new resident, and ask all the questions we have.”
“Yeah, about that,” said Squirrel, “you’d better have plenty of time to wait for the answers. Sloth talks really slowly, maybe I forgot to say.”
“You didn’t forget,” said Hare. “Squirrel, why don’t you go tell everyone about Sloth, and about the party. Let’s have it on Saturday.”
“In your meadow, like always?”
“Sure, the meadow is a great place for parties. Hey, Squirrel, you didn’t happen to ask what Sloth’s favorite food is?”
“Nope,” said Squirrel. “Probably something in a slow cooker. Seeya, Hare.”
“Slow cooker, ha ha,” said Hare sarcastically to himself after Squirrel had left. “Still…it would be nice to have Sloth’s favorite at the party. Maybe Beaver can find something about that in one of his books.” Hare hopped off to see Beaver.
“Quite a puzzle,” said Beaver, leafing through a think book. “Squirrel didn’t happen to mention toes, did he?”
“Toes?” asked Hare.
“There are two different sorts of sloths,” explained Beaver, “two-toed and three-toed. And they probably have different favorite foods.”
“Oh,” said Hare. “No, Squirrel didn’t say anything about toes. He seemed quite, um, taken by how slowly Sloth talks, though. Mentioned it several times.”
“I think Sloths do everything slowly,” said Beaver. “In fact, the puzzle I just referred to is this: how did Sloth get here? They live quite far away, on a different continent.”
“Huh,” said Hare. “I don’t suppose ‘walking’ is an option?”
“Says here that sloths aren’t big walkers,” said Beaver, pointing at something on a page. “Sleeping seems to be their main deal.”
“Well on Saturday we can just ask,” said Hare. “And I’ll see if Magpie can stop by to deliver Sloth the invitation and ask about favorite treats.”
Sometime later, Magpie perched on a branch near where Sloth was napping — still hanging upside-down — and cleared her throat. Sloth opened an eye and smiled.
“Good morning,” said Sloth. “I’m Sloth. I’ve just arrived.”
“It’s afternoon,” said Magpie, “but that’s okay, Sloth. Nice to meet you; I’m Magpie.”
“Good afternoon, in that case, said Sloth, smiling. “What brings you to this tree, Magpie?”
“As a matter of fact, you do,” said Magpie. “Squirrel has been telling everyone about meeting you, and now there’s a ‘welcome-to-the-forest’ party on Saturday. It’s in Hare’s meadow, where we always have parties. You’re invited. You’re the guest of honor, for that matter, and Hare wants to know your favorite food so he can have some ready.”
“Oh my,” said Sloth. “That sounds lovely, Magpie. I’d better get started. Where did you say this meadow was?”
“Er, there’s no need to hurry,” said Magpie. “The meadow is just 7 trees in that direction,” she said, pointing with her wing. “But it’s not until Saturday.”
“What day is today?” asked Sloth.
“Just Wednesday,” said Magpie.
Sloth looked in the direction of the meadow. “Seven trees, you say? Yes, I’d better get started. I’m not the speediest, you see.”
“Whatever you say,” said Magpie. “But about your favorite food…”
“Oh, yes,” said Sloth, “I’m not fussy about food. Some sort of leaves would be nice. But I don’t need many. How long do these parties last, as a rule?”
“Oh, three or four hours,” said Magpie. “At least.”
“Perhaps two leaves, then,” said Sloth. “A third, just in case I’m particularly famished — or possibly if leaves around here are particularly delicious.”
“Two or three leaves? Are you sure about that?” asked Magpie, looking at Sloth. In her mind Magpie was estimating size-to-weight ratios, caloric requirements, and nutritional volumes.
“Oh, quite sure,” smiled Sloth. “I’m not the speediest eater, either. In fact, I rather suspect I’m not the speediest at anything.”
“If you say so,” said Magpie. She made a mental note to tell Hare to have a whole bowl of leaves available. “Oh, one other thing before I take my leave, Sloth. If it’s not too personal a question, how many toes do you have?”
“Not at all,” smiled Sloth. “Where I come from that’s an important thing. You see, Magpie, some sloths have two toes and some have three. I’m a two-toer, and we’re much friendlier and more gregarious. Those three-toers tend to be snobby and keep entirely to themselves. I doubt any of my three-toer cousins would even go to your party — but I’ll be there. Now if you’ll excuse me, I should be moving along.”
It had taken Sloth so long to finish talking that Magpie noticed the sun was going down. She hated flying in the dark, so she said goodbye to Sloth and headed home. “What an unusual fellow,” she muttered to herself.
By the time the party started around the middle of Saturday, Sloth had arrived on the lowest branch of Hare’s big tree. Still hanging upside-down, and still declining everyone’s invitation to hop down to the ground. “No thank you,” said Sloth, “we sloths don’t much like the ground. Our feet are much better at trees.” Sloth waved a paw, showing huge curved claws that were excellent for hooking onto tree branches, but really did look very awkward for walking on the ground.
Since Sloth was the guest of honor and wouldn’t come down, the party moved so it was right under Sloth’s branch. Sloth patiently answered everyone’s questions, even though you had to keep track because the questions came so fast, and Sloth spoke so slowly, that each answer was removed from its question by three or four other questions. They found out that Sloth’s pronoun was “she,” that she came from a place called “South America,” that she hung upside down nearly all the time — even asleep — and her favorite food really was leaves. She was very pleasantly surprised by the leaves in the forest, pronouncing them much tastier than any others she’d had. Hare thought she might just be trying to be polite. But the one thing they didn’t discover was how Sloth had traveled so far and arrived in the forest. She wasn’t sure herself.
“I got an idea ‘bout that,” said a voice from the edge of the party. It was Wharf, one of the rats from the seaport. His brother Bilge was there too. “We think Sloth came on the Nina Pa,” said Wharf.
“She’s a freighter,” added Bilge, who was always interested in details. “About 10 thousand tons. Steam turbine power. Built in Hiroshima, ya know, and originally called the ‘Kojima Maru.’ She was…”
“That there’s quite enough,” said Wharf, cuffing his brother on the ear. “Nobody’s in’tested in that rot, Bilgey.”
“They mights be,” grumbled Bilge.
“Anyways,” said Wharf, “the Nina come into port just a week back, outta Georgetown, Guyana. I reckon that’s how Sloth got hereabouts.”
“That,” said Beaver, “is a reasonable possibility as to Sloth’s transcontinental journey. It leaves unanswered, however, the question of how Sloth came to the forest. It is an hour’s journey from the seaport for a relatively swift ground-based traveler.”
“Well Bilge and me, we hopped a truck,” said Wharf. “We ain’t ones to hoof it. Reckon Sloth mighta done the same.”
“I’m afraid I can’t say one way or the other,” said Sloth. “I simply don’t remember how I arrived here. I woke up one morning and here I was.”
Hare noticed that Sloth was looking pretty tired. “And we’re all very glad you came,” he said. “But it’s getting a bit late, everyone, and our new friend Sloth must still be tired from her journey, however she managed it. Let’s let her get some rest, shall we?”
Everyone agreed, and the center of the party drifted away from Sloth’s branch and toward a big stump where Hare had laid out an enormous tray of treats for everyone.
“Thank you, Hare,” said Sloth sleepily. “If you don’t mind, I think I’ll just take a short nap before heading back.”
“Of course, said Hare. “Would you like me to pack you some extra leaves to take with you?”
“Thank you, but no need,” said Sloth. “There’s no shortage of leaves around here.”
Hare ducked into his kitchen for a moment to get the latest batch of tea cakes, and hopped them out to the stump. He was busy serving and chatting for a while, until Magpie said “hey Hare, where did Sloth go?”
“She’s still where she was,” said Hare, not looking. “She said she was going to take a nap before heading back to her tree.”
“No she isn’t,” said Magpie. “Look for yourself.”
Hare looked for himself. Sloth was nowhere to be seen.
“Huh,” said Hare, “she must have headed home anyway.”
“If Sloth was heading home,” said Magpie, “I think she’d just be a little bit further along on the same branch. It took her since Thursday to get here, you know.”
“Look, I can’t keep track of everyone all the time,” said Hare, who was feeling exasperated because Otter and Muskrat had started batting a tea cake back and forth through the air. “Cut it out, you two!”
“I wonder,” said Magpie. She took off in the direction of Squirrel’s tree — now Squirrel’s and Sloth’s. As she swooped past, she noticed something hanging upside down from a sizable limb, apparently asleep. It was Sloth.
“How,” muttered Magpie, “did Sloth do?” She shrugged, which is quite a trick if you’re a bird and you’re flying at the time, then headed straight back to the party. If Otter and Muskrat were still throwing that tea cake around, she thought she’d try to snatch it right out of the air.
