It seemed like an ordinary day in the forest. The breeze stirred the leaves around. The river flowed. The plants grew. But then Hare heard a knock on his door.
It was an ordinary knock; just a quick rat-a-tat. But something about it gave Hare a bad feeling. On his way to open it he grabbed a carrot, just in case. A carrot usually helped.
Hare opened the door. There was a small animal there. He looked a little like Otter, but he was wearing an old-fashioned hat and a raincoat. “Probably not an otter,” thought Hare.
“Is your name Hare?” asked the animal.
“It’s what I go by around here,” said Hare.
“Good enough for me,” said the animal. “I’m Ferret. I’m a PI, a tec, a private eye some call me. Ask you a few questions?”
“Sure,” said Hare, taking a bite of his carrot. “Ask away, champ, I got nothin’ to hide.”
“Didn’t say you did,” said Ferret. “Can I come in, or shall we conduct our business out here in public?”
“Yeah, you can come in,” said Hare, holding the door open. Ferret went in. Hare peered around outside. Nobody around. He closed the door. “Have a seat,” he said to Ferret, chewing his carrot.
“You got another one a’ those?” asked Ferret, nodding at the carrot. “I was tryin’ to quit until last week when this case came along. The stress got to me.”
Hare silently handed Ferret a carrot. “Thanks,” said Ferret, taking a nibble. “You know why I’m here, right Rabbit?”
“Hare,” said Hare. “I got no clue why you’re here. Maybe you’re lost.”
“I don’t get lost,” said Ferret. “So you wanna play dumb, fine with me. Okay, long ears, this is the skinny. You was seen last week. At a party. You know the one. The party. In. The. Barn.”
“So what if I was?” said Hare, leaning against the wall.
“I’ll tell ya what,” said Ferret. He was nibbling his carrot quickly.
“You wanna take it easy there,” said Hare, indicating the carrot. “That’s from my own stock. You don’t want to overdo it, if ya know what I mean.”
Ferret looked at his carrot, then turned to Hare and took a huge bite, on purpose. Like he was flaunting it. “I been around,” he said, “I can take whatever you wanna dish out, hopper. Now, spill. What were you doin’ at that party?”
Hare was taken aback by the stunt with the carrot. He’d figured Ferret, who was pretty small, wouldn’t be able to keep up with him in the carrot department. He glared at Ferret and quickly gnawed his carrot down a couple more inches.
“It was a party,” said Hare, trying to sound nonchalant. “I was just having fun.”
Ferret took another enormous bite of his carrot. “There’s fun, and then there’s fun,” he said with his mouth full.
Is he really that rude? thought Hare, or is it just a tough-ferret act? Before he could say anything, Ferret continued.
“Nervous, long ears?” he said, grinning nastily. There were bits of carrot stuck in his teeth. “Couldn’t help but notice, you were sounding kind of chalant there.”
Curses, foiled again, thought Hare. I was doing my best to do that nonchalant thing, and some of that chalant stuff leaked though. Whatever it is. “Nah,” he said, trying to lean against the wall more like the way an innocent hare being questioned by mistake would lean. “I ain’t nervous. You got nothin’ on me, shorty.”
Ferret very deliberately finished his carrot. He licked his paw carefully. “Didn’t say I did,” he said. “Sounds like somebody has a guilty conscience, rabbit.”
“Hare”, said Hare. “And my conscience is as clean as a whistle.”
“Oh really,” said Ferret. “This the whistle you’re talkin’ about, hopper?” He pulled a whistle out of the pocket of his coat. It was a very dirty whistle.
“Hey, just a minute,” said Hare, who suddenly was nervous. Who was this Ferret, walking around the forest with a dirty whistle? “You the cops or somethin’?”
“I ain’t the cops,” said Ferret. “Just trying to find out what went on at that party. Because it’s a funny thing, long ears, but nobody seems to know. That guy Beaver was talking to them cows, and the story is that there was some kind of game going on.” He flipped through a tiny notebook. “Tag,” he read. “Supposedly. But that’s all anybody knows, rabbit. So somebody hired me to find out.”
“W-who hired you?” asked Hare.
“Sorry, no can do, hopper,” said Ferret. “That’s for me to know and you to not find out. But that’ll do for now.” Ferret smoothly rose from his chair. “I think I got what I needed,” he said. “For now,” he said, pointing a claw at Hare, “you sit tight, but I’ll be back. Gotta get to the bottom of this one way or another. Don’t worry, I’ll let myself out.”
Ferret opened the door and walked out. Just before he left he turned and said “And one more thing. Don’t leave town, rabbit.”
“Hare,” said Hare, as Ferret stalked away down the path. Hare got himself another carrot and sagged into his favorite chair. “Oh dear,” he said to himself. “I didn’t expect anything like this.”
Then he shook his head to clear it. “Hey wait a minute,” he said to himself. “It was just a party. There wasn’t anything going on that shouldn’t have.” He took a bite of carrot. Remembered how Ferret had sauntered in like he owned the place. Ferret had been pretty confident. “Gee,” whispered Hare under his breath. “I wonder…”
