Pylimitics

"Simplicity" rearranged


The magic ring

Dog, Bear, and Hare were having a secret meeting. Not that it was secret from everyone. It was only a secret from Magpie. 

It had turned out to be surprisingly hard to have a meeting that Magpie didn’t know about. She flew over the forest every day, and she seemed to notice everything. That’s why Dog had trotted along a path she used all the time, making sure to move in the sort of way that said (if anyone had been watching) “I’m just trotting along this path the way I always do. I’m definitely not going to a secret meeting.”

Hare had crept carefully through the forest, staying under thick bushes as much as he could, so that nobody was likely to be able to see him from above. 

Bear knew that Magpie only flew in the daytime, so he had traveled after dark and hidden until the meeting.

They were pretty sure if they met out in the open Magpie would see them, so they met in the barn. They’d gotten everyone in the barn to agree not to say anything about seeing them there; even Barney the barn owl. They’d been afraid Barney, being a bird, might be on Magpie’s side. But when he heard why they were meeting, he grinned (which, for an owl, is quite unusual) and said he’d be glad to help.

“Are you sure?” said Hare. “Why do you want to help us with our plan?”

“I just think it would be fun to see somebody trick Magpie, for once,” said Barney. “Don’t worry, I won’t say a word.”

As it turned out, they didn’t really have to worry about Barney anyway; they met at midmorning, when Barney was up in the rafters of the barn taking a nap. 

“I don’t have any good ideas,” said Hare. “We can’t do the nose trick or the ears trick; Magpie came up with both of those.”

“We can’t do any kind of ‘I can see farther than you’ trick either,” said Bear, “Magpie can see better than we can.”

“Magpie always thinks she knows what’s going on in town better than anybody,” said Hare, “maybe something about that?”

“What if,” said Dog, “we let Magpie think she’s playing another trick, but the trick is really on her?”

“I like that one,” said Hare. “But what could the trick be? She’s going to suspect any of us.”

“We’re going to need someone to ask Magpie for help playing a trick,” said Bear. 

“Barney said he’d help,” said Dog.

“But Barney isn’t the sort to want to play a trick on anyone,” said Hare. “He can help us some other way.”

“Flying will probably help,” said Bear.

“Otter,” said Dog. “Otter loves tricks; he’s just usually too busy having fun to make up any by himself.”

“But can Otter keep our secret?” asked Hare. “He can be kind of silly, you know.”

“I think he’d do it,” said Bear. “Because he’d think it was hilarious.”

“Otter thinks everything is hilarious,” grumbled Hare.

More hilarious,” said Bear. So it was decided; they’d ask Otter to ask Magpie to help him play a trick, and maybe they’d ask Barney to help out because he could fly.

“You know,” said Dog, “Barney can fly at night, and he doesn’t make any noise at all. I bet he could fly right past Magpie and she wouldn’t even wake up.”

“Hey,” said Bear, “that gives me an idea. Lean close; I’ll whisper in your ear, Dog. You’ll hear me anyway, Hare.”

Dog and Hare liked Bear’s plan, and that afternoon Hare hopped over to Otter’s house to explain and ask for help. Just as Bear had guessed, Otter thought the idea was hilarious and signed up right away. 

A couple of days later, Magpie was flying over the river and noticed Otter waving her down. She swooped down and perched on a nearby branch. “Hi Otter,” she said, “what’s up?”

“I need some help,” said Otter. “I want to play a trick on Raccoon, and you can help me.”

“Love to,” said Magpie, “what do you have in mind?”

“This” said Otter. He held out the shiniest, sparkliest ring Magpie had ever seen. Magpies eye’s got wide; she loved shiny things and had her own collection of them. “What’s that?” she asked.

“You know how Raccoon likes to keep everything clean, and she washes stuff?” said Otter. “She’s over here at the river all the time washing her carrots and everything. Yesterday she dropped this. I noticed it and shouted to her before she left, but she said it didn’t matter.”

“Why didn’t it matter?” said Magpie.

“Raccoon said it was her lucky charm, and it was magic so it couldn’t get lost,” said Otter. “She says she doesn’t mind dropping it, because no matter where she loses it, the next morning it’s right back in her house.”

“That’s hard to believe,” said Magpie.

“I know, right?” said Otter. “Anyway, I wanted to play a trick on her. You take the ring and keep it in your nest, and when she comes back to look for it I’ll say ‘gee, Raccoon, I’m sure I put it right here, but it’s gone.’ And then Raccoon will argue about it for a while, and you can swoop in to show us the new sparkly ring you found in town.”

“Ooookaaayyyy…” said Magpie, thinking it over.

“And and and it will be the same ring!” added Otter.

“Yes, I got that part already,” said Magpie. “I have to be honest, Otter, this is not the best trick I’ve heard of.”

Otter’s grin sagged a bit. “I thought it would be funny,” he said.

“Oh, no, I think you’ll get a good laugh out of it,” said Magpie. She was thinking to herself that Otter could get a good laugh out of almost anything. “Sure, I’ll do it. And maybe once Raccoon sees that the ring isn’t really magic, I could trade her something for it. It’s just the sort of thing I’d like to add to my collection.”

“OK, let’s get ready,” said Otter. “I’m leaving; Raccoon will be along any time now.”

Sure enough, Magpie had just enough time to hang the ring on a twig at the top of a giant fir tree and fly back when along came Raccoon. She seemed upset.

“Otter,” she said, “do you remember my lucky charm? The sparkly ring I dropped here yesterday? The magic one that always comes…or came back?”

“Sure,” said Otter. “Something go wrong with the magic?”

“Oh dear,” said Raccoon, “I don’t know what happened. Every other time I dropped it, it just appeared back in my house the next morning.”

“Don’t worry about it,” said Otter, “I knew you liked it, Raccoon, so I put it away where it would be safe. Just a sec; I’ll get it for you.” Otter went into his house.

“Hi Raccoon,” said Magpie. “I was just visiting Otter, and I heard what you said. You have a magic ring?”

“Had it until this morning,” said Raccoon. She told Magpie all about it. She hoped she was remembering all the details Bear, Dog, and Hare had dreamed up for the story. 

“Wow,” said Magpie. “That sounds like something I’d like to see when Otter brings it out.”

Otter finally came out of his house, his whiskers drooping. “I’m sorry, Raccoon,” he said, “but it’s not where I put it. It’s not anywhere. I don’t know what happened.”

“Aha!” said Raccoon happily, “I know what must have happened. The magic was just a little late today. I’m sure it’s back in my house now. See ya, Otter; bye Magpie, I’m going to just dash home to make sure it’s there.”

“Okay, called Otter as Raccoon was leaving. “I’ll keep looking for it, Raccoon, just in case.”

Otter put his paw over his mouth to stop his giggles. “Bring it back tomorrow,” he said to Magpie. “Raccoon will be back again hoping I found it. And tomorrow I’ll bring it out and tell Raccoon it’s not magic at all!”

“See you tomorrow,” said Magpie, and she flew up to retrieve the ring, then flew home. She admired it in her nest until the sun started to go down, then she went to sleep.

In the middle of the night, Barney, flying as silently as only an owl can, glided close past Magpie’s nest and snitched the ring. He flew to the river and dropped it down to Otter, who waved. 

The next day Otter was playing in the river when Magpie arrived. “Hi Magpie,” said Otter, “did you bring the ring?”

“That’s just it,” said Magpie, “I can’t find it.”

“You can’t find it??” said Otter. “Magpie, that’s going to spoil the whole trick. How could you lose it?”

“I…I don’t know,” said Magpie. “I kept it right beside me, but then in the morning it was gone.”

“What am I going to tell Raccoon?” asked Otter. “I was going to give it back today.”

“How should I know,” said Magpie. “It’s your trick, Otter.”

Otter sighed, which was something he hardly ever did. “Let me grab a snack from inside and think about it,” he said. “Can I bring you anything?”

“Do you have any seeds?” asked Magpie.

“I have a tin full of seeds,” said Otter. “I’ll bring it out.”

Otter came back outside carrying a tin and a carrot. He put the tin down and pulled the top off, saying “help yourself, Magpie.” He sat down to eat his carrot. 

Magpie reached into the tin and then jumped back when a squawk. 

“What’s wrong?” said Otter. “Something wrong with the seeds?”

“No,” said Magpie, “but look at this.” She reached into the tin and pulled out the ring.

“Oh very funny,” said Otter. “Not. Come on Magpie, quit fooling around. Give that back; Raccoon will be here any minute.”

“I’m not fooling around,” said Magpie. “I didn’t put the ring in there, Otter.”

“Right,” said Otter, “and you never play tricks on anybody. You can’t fool me, Magpie. Never mind, though, here comes Raccoon.”

“Raccoon ambled out of the forest. “Hello Otter,” she said. “Oh, hi again Magpie. Hey look at this, guys.” Raccoon held out a bright blue feather. “It’s my new lucky charm.”

“Your new lucky charm?” said Otter. “But I found your old one, here it is.” He held out the ring.

“Oh that,” said Raccoon. “I don’t think that was ever really magic. And I kept dropping it anyway. This feather is much better; I can tuck it behind my ear and it stays put.” She tucked it behind her ear. “And, besides,” she said, “it makes me look fashionable.” She swayed back and forth, showing off the feather.

“Nice,” said Magpie. She was eying the ring. It was so shiny. “Say, Raccoon, if you don’t want that ring any more, would you mind if I put it in my collection? It’s the nicest one I ever saw.”

“Go ahead,” said Raccoon with a wave. “Keep it. It’s too much trouble for me.”

“Yeah,” said Otter, “it’s no good to eat or play with, so I don’t want it either.”

“Thanks!” said Magpie. She took the ring, admiring how it gleamed in the sun.

“I’m off to so some washing,” said Raccoon. “Just stopped by to let you know I don’t care about the ring any more. Bye.” She ambled back into the forest.

“Rats,” said Otter, my trick didn’t work at all.”

“Next time,” said Magpie, still looking at the ring. “I’ve played lots of tricks, and they don’t always work. You just have to keep at it and think of a better idea, Otter.”

“I guess,” said Otter. “I’m going fishing.” He dove into the river.

“That worked out nicely,” said Magpie to herself as she flew back to her nest with the ring.

When Otter came out of his house the next morning, there was Magpie.

“Otter,” she said, “the ring is gone.”

“What ring?” said Otter. “Oh, that one Raccoon gave you? That’s too bad Magpie. Hope you find it. Hey, I was just going to eat my breakfast beside the river. Hang on and I’ll get the seeds.” He ducked back inside and came out with the tin of seeds for Magpie. “Here,” he said, “this will make you feel better.” He took the top off and put it next to Magpie.

Magpie reached in for some seeds and jumped back with a squawk. “It’s here!” she shrieked.

“What is?” said Otter, chewing a potato.

The ring!” said Magpie, pulling the ring out of the tin. 

“Oh, okay, so you found it.” said Otter. “Good. Now I was just thinking…” 

But Magpie had already flown away.

The next morning, Magpie’s loud pecking at his door woke Otter up. “What is it?” he said.

Magpie’s feathers were all ruffled. “The seeds,” she said. “Where are the seeds?”

“What seeds?” asked Otter, rubbing his eyes.

“The seeds in the tin!” said Magpie. “Bring the tin, Otter. Bring it now!

“Okay, okay,” said Otter, carrying the tin of seeds out to the front step. “Here. Take some with you, Magpie, so you can have breakfast at your place.”

Magpie reached into the tin, squawked, and pulled out the ring. “It really is a magic ring!” she said, “but the magic brings it to you now, Otter!” 


“What’s that about a magic ring?” asked Hare, who had just hopped out of a bush.

“I think Magpie believes in magic rings now,” said Dog, trotting out of the forest.

“Magpie? The one who’s so smart because she’s always perching next to the coffee shop at the college?” said Bear, ambling out of the forest behind Dog.

“I’m not kidding, guys,” said Magpie. “This is a real magic ring! I have it in my nest at night, and every morning it magically appears in Otter’s tin of seeds!”

“Oh,” said Hare, “I wonder how it gets there?”

“I told you,” said Hare, “it’s magic.”

“You know what else is magic?” said Dog, pretending to talk to Bear. “Barney can fly without making any sound at all.”

“That’s right,” said Bear, pretending to talk to Dog, “and he can fly in the dark too, because of being an owl.”

“You could almost imagine,” said Hare, “that an owl could gram something from a nest in the middle of the night and anybody sleeping there wouldn’t even know it.”

“Never mind that,” said Magpie, “I’m telling you this ring is real magi…”

Magpie looked at Otter, who had both paws over his mouth trying not to laugh. She looked at Raccoon, who had just ambled out of the forest with a big grin. She looked at Hare, Dog, and Bear, who smiled back.

“Gotcha!” they said together. 

“Yeah, well, I’m keeping this ring,” said Magpie. 



About Me

I’m Pete Harbeson, a writer located near Boston, Massachusetts. In addition to writing my own content, I’ve learned to translate for my loquacious and opinionated pup Chocolate. I shouldn’t be surprised, but she mostly speaks in doggerel. You can find her contributions tagged with Chocolatiana.