Pylimitics

Simplicity rearranged

unmonetizable content since 1997


Chocolatiana

  • I’m Still a Kid

    I often get excitedwhen I’m out to walk and trotand I meet a stranger dogwhose acquaintance I’ve not got. If they are still a puppythen we both will want to play;older dogs are boring’cause they listen to the “stay.” I know what I’m supposed to do,I just don’t always do it.I might get scolded after,But Continue reading

  • Theorem

    I love the leaves in autumn,and also needles (pine).The sniffs are very pleasantand the feel on paws is fine. I’ve noticed that each needleis exactly like a line.You also get some conesfrom the tree that’s labeled pine. There’s a crackpot human notionthat thanks to pines I see;they do a thing with numbersthat they call “geometree.” Continue reading

  • Bigger ain’t better

    To the averagecanine brainit causes neitherstress nor strain to outsmart humansonce again;it’s pretty easy,that is plain. I hear the humansbrag and boastabout their brain size;it’s their most oft-spoken claimbecause it’s s’posedto mean they’re smartand you are toast. But we just laugh,my pals and me,because we’re smartenough to see brain size is nota kibble scoop;it’s them, Continue reading

  • Aaahhhhh

    Full-body massagemakes me give a big wag.I sprawl on my carpet(a thick comfy shag)and my staff of pet humanswith their pampering whirlmeans I feel like thehappiest pup in the world. -Chocolate Continue reading

  • The perfect treat

    I get lotsof kinds of treatswhen all I say is “please.” One of my all-timefavorites isa lovely piece of cheese. Cheese is just the rightest stuffit’s chewyand has salt. It might just bethat rarest thing:a treat without a fault. -Chocolate Continue reading

  • Open Letter

    This is a noteto my four-legged pals:When you talk with your humans,beware! Their idea of “right now”is pathetically thinand they only know thingsthat are there. I think it’s becausealthough senses they haveit’s their eyesthey rely on the most. “Out of sight out of mind”is a thing that they say,and that mind, if it’s there,is a Continue reading

  • Poor dears

    I feel sorry for humans;they really can’t smellwith their nosesso far from the ground. And that means they neverknow what’s going onor which dogs and catscame around. I could tell them,I guesswhen the most recent squirrelwas trespassing right in my yard, But it’s such a big botherteaching them how to speak.Even listening, for themis quite Continue reading

  • Frozen off

    This morning it was super coldwhen I went out on my patrol.The air was icy; made me coughHumans’ tails? They froze them off! -Chocolate Continue reading

  • Sleeping in

    Most mornings I happento be awake firstand I like a massagewhere I lie. A nose in the earalways wakes up my folks;they will grumblebut then they’ll comply. Some days (like today)I like to sleep lateand my humans could snooze in the clear, But they’re ruled by routine;automatic-al-ly,they are up with nonose in the ear! -Chocolate Continue reading

  • The best spot

    When I enter a room I do a quick scan.Not by eye or by nose or by ear.I use a sixth sense that humans don’t haveto detect what soft cushions are here. I check each, compare,I tweak and I fettleto see which is softest and best.Then I know that I’ve foundThe most comfy aroundAnd that Continue reading

About Me

I’m Pete Harbeson, a writer located near Boston, Massachusetts. In addition to writing my own content, I’ve learned to translate for my loquacious and opinionated pup Chocolate Bossypaws. I shouldn’t be surprised, but she mostly speaks in doggerel. You can find her contributions tagged with Chocolatiana.

Check out my other blog, Techlimitics, where I’m grappling with the nature of simplicity.